to a nightmare within a nightmare

so i had this dream last night that my mom was somehow borught back to life. i dunno how or why...but in the dream she was sayinf something i could hear and my dad was fightin with me...he was happy i was pissed because she fucking left me....said if only she would have listened she would still be alive. that she was selfish....looking back it's kinda true. she got out of the hosiptal then went right back to take radiation....when her family told her not to. the result she got sicker and it ultimately lead to her dieing a week later. i dunno but i feel like shit earlier cause of it. i had forgot about the dream and then it came back it was insane. i don't know what the fuck is wrong with my brain to make me remember horrible things. i'd love to eraser something...but i guess i just have to live with it...anyways i just had to get that shit out....back to attempting to write my art history outline.